Happy Pride Month from a former Baptist.

When I was a child, I went to a Baptist church. They taught me about Jesus, how He saved me from my sins, and many other good and righteous things. They also taught me to reject and fear the gay community, that drinking wine would send me to hell, and many other things I have rejected over the years.

When Jeff and I first got married in 1988, I went to travel school and became a travel agent. I graduated first in my class, was the speaker at my graduation and felt very well equipped to begin my career. But no one would hire me. This was in the stone ages, no internet, no LinkedIn, no Indeed, just going to Kinko’s and printing up a stack of resumes and pounding the pavement. Showing up at door after door with a “Help Wanted” sign in the window, or scouring newspaper ads and asking, face to face, “Will you hire me?”

I got rejected from multiple travel agencies. They congratulated me on my degree and then added, “But we need someone with experience who can hit the ground running.” No one would give me a chance or wanted to take time and train a green agent. 

Then I walked into the door of a travel agency where two very friendly guys greeted me and reviewed my resume. They said, “We really need help, and we’d love to hire you, but we need to tell you, this is a gay travel agency. We sell gay vacations and cruises. Are you okay with that?” 

I thought about my Baptist upbringing, and I got a knot in my stomach. Then I thought about my husband and my two stepdaughters and how poor we were and how desperately we needed the money.

I said, “No that doesn’t bother me.” I was afraid to tell anyone I knew where I was working. I knew they would judge me and disown me. But I am so happy I said yes to that job offer, because that gay travel agency was where I found the truth. 

The “gay agenda” I had been warned about didn’t exist. I worked with great guys who were kind, generous and fun. Their only agenda was to sell trips to gay families who wanted to take vacations in places where they would be welcomed and not shunned. 

They called me their “Token Straight” (ha-ha!) They were good to me and to Jeff. They invited us into their home. They brought me presents from every place they went. They were totally flexible with my schedule when I had to leave and pick up one of my kids from school, or anything I ever asked them, they said yes.

All of our clients were also lovely people. Gay couples trying to plan cruises and trips, just like Jeff and I were. Couples who had been together for decades but couldn’t marry. And sure, a few single guys going on singles trips to try and meet someone, but is that any different than a straight person taking a singles vacation? No.

No one was trying to make me gay. No one tried to make Jeff gay. No one tried to indoctrinate my kids into anything. All the lies the church taught me were laid bare when I actually became entrenched in the gay community. They were fiercely loyal to their friends. They acted more like the church than the church. They showed up for anyone in their community in need. 

Then why did the church teach me to fear and reject them? Sure, it is in the Bible, but there are a million rules in the Bible we pay ZERO attention to. So why this one? I share this video frequently because I’ve never seen anything as good as explaining it as this one 4-minute clip from the West Wing. https://youtu.be/DSXJzybEeJM?si=8PmQPMj2hRU9bDoL

I spent years working in churches and religious organizations. You may be shocked to learn this, but over the years, I worked with *many* people who were gay. Dozens. But they never told anyone for fear of being rejected from their church. Some of them told me because they knew I was a safe place. 

If you are in a church spouting off about how much you hate gay people, just know that your co-workers or people in your congregation may be gay, or may have a gay child, and every time you open your bigoted mouth you are breaking their hearts.

I hear people ask, “Why is there a gay pride month?” I saw a quote that said, “Gay Pride is important because someone tonight still believes they’re’ better off dead than being gay.” That leveled me!

Did you know that LGBTQ young people are more than four times as likely to attempt suicide than their straight peers. 41% of LGBTQ young people have seriously considered attempting suicide in the past year. These stats are quoted from the Trevor Project. https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/article/facts-about-lgbtq-youth-suicide/

If your belief system is such that it makes a teenager want to die rather than face your rejection, how does that line up with God’s unconditional love? “Tolerance” is not love. Love is love. Open heart, open arms.

Please open your mind and your heart. Let someone who is different than you into your circle. It will make your life richer; I promise.